Sooo I finally shook my Stalker....

So I've been MIA for a bit doing the REAL LIFE thing (FACEBOOK). I'd been spending most of my time in the private secret groups of Facebook with all the other pervs. One group in particular has a high amount of foolishness and phuckery going on. That's where I first met my stalker. She had been on my friends list before but the stalking didn't begin until then.

Now this chick looks old enough to be my mother yet she was actually only 5 calendar years older than me. Normally I'd chalk it up to me looking good for my age but nope, she just looks like an old lady. You all know how it starts... The abundance of likes on EVERY thing you post. The agreeing with EVERY thing you post even when you're dead wrong. The comments when you check in places... "And you went without me.... I love that place... Let me know when you're going there again etc etc..." No bitch... NO!!

It started being super obvious to EVERYONE that she was all up in my mix. Now I fancy myself a ladies man. A bonafide closer when it comes to the ladies, but this here.. NO MA'AM.

My sister and other friends tried to run interference and scare her off, but this chick was like a bad case of Athletes foot. She just kept coming back. Finally I had (had) enough. I know this might come as a shock to you readers but some people say I can be quite mean. I had to take matters into my own hands. I started talking trash to her. She laughed it off at first and I went harder and harder. She finally broke last week.

I must say, I'm relieved.. She removed me from her friends list, left the group and attempted to curse me out. All the while I finally understood why I was so upset about it all. It finally clicked. BITCH I'm out of your league. I'm way to cute for you to even THINK you had a chance. In fact I'm down right offended. I must be letting myself slip if this GURILLABOPOTOMUS thought she could get this. Seriously, either you give yourself more credit than you should EVER, or I'm slipping in my pimpin. Now, I've banged my share of ugly chicks. But that was me doing charity work but this here.....HELL NO!

At least I don't have to look over my shoulders... My stalker is gone and that my friends is a good thing...