Internet Dating HORROR - The Hoodwink Pt. 2

So I told you all the story of the HOODWINK and the girl who gave me a photo of herself about what she is going to look like once she gets done with her work out program.

So yesterday I'm in Target picking up some things for around the house. I have my son with me (4) and we are discussing why he thinks he REALLY NEEDS to get a hot wheel racing car (he needed it because he never had one like this one by the way). So we are standing in line about to purchase these items + the new hot wheel car and he says to me. "Daddy, why is that big lady staring at us?" I look over and sure enough this woman is staring at us like we were the last piece of pie in the dish. I look away real fast not to make eye contact.

We step closer to the register and my son is tugging on my shirt. "Daddy.... Daddy, she is still staring at us." I started to tell my son to tell her staring is not nice but I knew he would actually do it. I turn to get another glance because I didn't know this person. Sure enough she was and now she is waving. Not that wave that you do when you are trying to get someone's attention. She was doing that wave where you just bend your fingers.

I'm like OH hell no, not today, not with my son. I've got a reputation and my son is used to seeing me interact with purty girls. I can't have his views tarnished so I turn back around, start making small talk with the cashier. Suddenly it gets dark like when the clouds roll in on a movie set. The birds stopped singing, the horses start running and hound dogs start howling. I get a tap on my shoulder and my knees lock up. I now know why the little white girl in the scary movies keeps falling down!

I turn around and sure enough it's the girl who been staring. I'm like damn are you serious? She is all on me. "Hey, Darrell how you been?" Now anyone who knows me, knows that I hate being called Darrell, My name is DARNELL damnit get it right. Without a pause, skipping a beat or anything my little man takes one for the team. He throws himself on the grenade for his old man. My daddy's name isn't Darrell. You got the wrong guy. She immediately turns her attention to my son and tells him that he is sooo cute. He backs up from her and puts himself out of harms reach.

She tells me that she just wanted to say hi and we should get together for a drink or something. I ask her if we had met before and she says dang, like that? You don't remember me? It's me Tanitia! I looked at her again and sure enough it was. This is the girl who gave me the photo and had the halitosis. I'm like, oh hey, how you been? I had to cut her off quick, yea the drinks probably not gonna happen. I'm getting married. My son started to chime in and I had to cover his mouth and shut him up. So we exchange greetings and salutations and both head to the parking lot.

I start walking slow cause I didn't want anyone thinking I'm with this woman at all. We get to the truck and I get everything loaded up. I get my son in his seat and strap him in and he tells me, "Daddy, that woman had bad breathe, she needs to brush her teeth"

Four years old is my favorite age for kids!